Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Woke up at 6am this morning for more blood draws and vitals. The phlobotomist is starting to feel really bad for me everytime she comes to take my blood. She always apologizes every time, but loves to coo all over Taylor every time.
I got a phone call from the Nutrition Dpt at 7:30 this morning and they were just about to ask me what I wanted for breakfast, and then in mid-sentence she said "Oh, wait, are you on a liquid diet? Oh, nevermind. Uh, Sorry." and then hung up.
I wanted to cry. lol. I thought for a second that maybe I was going to get to eat some real food.
8:00am my breakfast tray arrived. Will said "Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it's red jello, chicken broth, and apple juice. Yum yum." I couldn't even make it through half of it. I drank the broth, skipped the jello. Drank the apple juice because it had the most calories. Threw the rest out.
Yesterday I had what I call a "food headache". You know, when you haven't eaten but then all you eat is sugar. I had to take 6 doses of painkillers to get rid of it, and was just really grouchy knowing that the only reason I had the headache in the first place was because I wasn't eating anything and then all they feed me is jello, juice, and whatnot. Just sugar. I must have downed at least 5 or 6 cups of chicken broth yesterday just to avoid the gross sugary foods. I would drink it and about 10 minutes later my stomach would be growling again. And then my meal tray would show up for my next meal and it would be...yep you guessed it - red jello, broth, and juice.
8:30am this morning my new nurse came in and told me that my lypaise levels went from 2020 to 1020 today. So that is half! That is SUPER good news. Of course, the only thing on my mind was "Do I get to eat something solid today???"
9:00am the internal medicine doctor came to see me and ask how I was doing. Told me again that my labs were looking better and they would be able to advance me to a "soft food" diet. Meaning, I will now get to have pudding, thick pureed soup, etc. I know it sounds silly, but this is very exciting for me.
10:00 the Gastro-Intestinal specialist stopped by (along with a 3rd year med student) to ask how I was doing. He is still under the impression that the reason my stomach is feeling better is because I must have passed a stone the night I came into the E.R. (last Thurs night). He said my labs looked better, and he is advancing me to a lowfat diet. Yeah, so I was confused. Is it soft foods or lowfat? Either way I'm pretty darn stoked.
10:30 the phlobotomist stopped by to take more blood. Apologized profusely, played with Taylor a bit, and then left. I told her that I now officially have no more blood to draw and that all of my veins have disappeared so it's useless. She laughed. No really....I was semi-serious.
11:00am my OB stopped by to see how I was doing. She was very excited to see that my labs had improved and said they would be advancing me to the B.R.A.T. diet. Now the brat diet? I'm sure lunch today will be a real surprise whatever it is. She asked how I was holding up with the new blood pressure medication (they switched it to one that doesn't effect heartrate levels since mine is still low sometimes). She told me that they're still going to keep me on it for a while since my BP is still high when I first wake up in the morning.
It's now 11:35 and I'm counting down the minutes to noon for when my food tray arrives. It will be my first good meal in days. I'm pretty excited. Very actually. Will it be the BRAT? Will it be lowfat? Will it be pudding? HOnestly either way I'm excited as long as it's not red jello and chicken broth.
There is talk that if I can handle today's food and my levels are good after the meals, then I MIGHT get to go home tomorow.
We had lots of visitors last night which was fun. Taylor has already grown some while we've been here - as he is now spending a little bit more time awake than asleep. I'm still breastfeeding him just fine amazingly enough. The human body is rather remarkable I think because it just seems that for as little as I've eaten I should be able to BF, but I am. Though I am sure it's probably skim milk.
I have advanced from sleeping on the labor/hospital bed (super uncomfortable) to the husband couch with Will. Trust me it's much comfier. I couldn't do this a week ago because of both stomach pains and also Csection/abdominal weakness. So I am pretty excited about that. It's the first time I've been able to snuggle with Will in about...3 or 4 weeks.
Preston is doing well at G&G's house, until last night we got a phonecall and Grandma said that for the first time ever Preston came up to her and said "Home? Hold baby brother? Home?" My heart broke when she told me that. Preston has always been all about staying at Grandma's house, so to hear him say he actually wanted to come home made me feel really bad. Luckily this morning my mom emailed me to tell me that he was back to normal and looking out the window wanting to go outside to "pet the birds" in the yard.
I am sad that we had to cancel all of the yummy meals that we were going to get from the Relief Society in our ward for having a baby. We weren't even home long enough to enjoy those meals yet. And now instead of getting to enjoy yummy post pardum meals, we'll get to enjoy extremely lowfat meals. LOL.
Well, something exciting is happening. My lunch tray is here. And somebody messed up and didn't get word to the dietary department that I have been advanced. It's red jello, broth, and juice. I'm about to cry. Excuse me while I go have a meltdown.
Monday, August 30, 2010
I thought that maybe I would get to go home today, but my lypaise levels went from 2,000 to 2,020 today. Not a huge difference, but they were hoping to see a drop in the levels.
So it's been another day of the liquid diet for me. I have been handling it pretty well, but today I am really starting to feel the hunger. Here is what I've eaten since Thursday:
Thursday night - 1 banana, 1.5 pieces of toast
Friday - water, ice chips
Saturday morning - liquid diet (juice, jello, broth)
Saturday afternoon - 2 vanilla puddings, pea soup, juice, 2 saltine crackers
Sunday morning - nothing, not even water. :(
Sunday afternoon - water
Sunday evening - liquid diet
Monday - liquid diet
For a lot of this time, they have had me hooked up to an IV giving me fluids that has helped. But it's just basically water and electrolytes. No calories or anything. Today I haven't been on an IV at all and I think it might be why I am feeling the hunger more. That or it's just that HELLO I haven't eaten hardly anything in the past 5 days.
Today I met with a lot of doctors. I have an internal medicine doctor who is now in charge of my care so he gives all of my orders (instead of my OB). Then there is my OB who is in charge of my pre-eclampsia issues (blood pressure). And then there is a Gastro-Intestinal specialist who I met with for the first time today and he will be my point of contact for outpatient care after I leave the hospital. Whenever that is. And then there are some surgeons that are working with the internal medicine doctor to look at my charts and give 2nd opinions and yadda yadda.
Will and I wrote a list of questions last night that we keep meaning to ask, but whenever a doctor comes and talks to us and then says "Do you have any questions for me?" we always say "Nope, thanks" but then later think of things we should have asked. So finally today we were able to get a lot of questions answered.
What exactly is going on?
I would like to know myself. Apparently the issues that I have been having are not the "textbook" symptoms and so they haven't been able to treat me in the text book way. But here is basically what is going on and the status:
Pre-Eclampsia - mostly resolved
When I first went into the ER I had a really high blood pressure, headache, swelling, and pain in abdomen. Textbook symtoms for Pre-Eclampsia (a pregnancy condition). They put me on magnesium sulfate for 24 hours which brings the blood pressure down and prevents seizures. After about 2 and 1/2 days, my BP has finally gotten back down into my normal range which is 120/70, with the occasional high reading. They have me taking a blood pressure pill twice a day to help keep the levels down. The thing that was confusing to my OB was that Pre-Eclampsia usually happens at the end of pregnancy or in women who have a history of high BP. I had never had high BP ever, so it was kind of weird that I got PE.
I will most likely have to stay on the BP pill until my 6 week post pardum appointment, with weekly checkins with my OB and daily BP checks on myself.
Low Pulse Rate/Trouble Breathing - Resolved
I had a weird low pulse rate for 3 days of 40 beats per minute. I kept joking to Will that my pulse was just going to keep going lower and lower until my heart stopped and I was dead. He didn't think that was too funny. They did an Xray of my heart, several EKG's and an ultrasound of my heart and everything looked really good and my heart looked strong and healthy with no abnormalities. Again, they really had no idea why my pulse was low. Over the past few days my pulse has come back up into the 60's (sometimes 70's, sometimes back down to the low 50's) but the fact that it's been coming up is good. Even though my pulse was 40 bpm, I still was getting 100% oxygen to everything so that was good.
Pancreatis - not resolved
This is the reason why I am still here. I have a "mild" case of Pregnancy-Induced Pancreatis (mild meaning this is my first episode and I have no gall stones, and that due to the bodily changes and estrogen levels during pregnancy it wacked out my pancreas).
They are a bit confused about my symptoms, which is why they have consulted surgeons and specialists because once again I am not a textbook case. Personally I think all of these doctors are having a lot of fun with the abnormal post pardum patient that they get to dig around and try to explore answers for. Doctors are into that huh.
I am learning a lot about Pancreatis. Basically the pancreas secretes three different juices to help digest food. One for fats, one for sugars, and one for starches. Mine is having trouble with the one that digests fats. So if I were to eat Fettucine Alfredo with extra cheese right now, my pancreas would not know how to digest it and I would most likely have awful awful stomach pains like the ones I had on Thursday.
Usually with Pancreatis, the answer is to take the person's gall bladder out because they usually get gall stones. I don't have any gall stones, but just some sludge in the tube that goes from the pancreas down to the intestines. So they obviously are not going to take my gall bladder out.
The reason they are keeping me here still, is because my Lypais levels are still elevated even on a liquid diet. Usually the answer to Pancreatis is to flush the pancreas with no food or liquid diet and it will "reset" itself. Well that didn't work and it's because of the sludge that they found so there is some blockage I guess.
I was hoping that after doing all liquids yesterday that they would take my levels again today and let me start eating some solid foods and possibly let me go home. However, they don't want to just send me home and then have it all come back and put me in the hospital again next week. So they are just doing some trial things to try and figure out the correct food combo/dosage to get the lypaise levels back down, get my pancreas stabilized, get me to eat some solid food without the levels going back up, and THEN I will be able to go home. I would see a nutritionalist before heading home that would talk to me about what kinds of foods I would be able to eat once getting home - which would most likely be a lowfat diet.
Two things they are trying to figure out (because it's baffling them) is my stomach pain is gone. The horrible painful stomach issues that I was having all day Thursday disappaited after I got into the ER. The GI specialist thinks that possibly I did have a gall stone and was passing it on Thursday night. So I passed it, and then that is why the pains were mostly gone and haven't come back and he hopes to be able just get rid of the sludge and get the levels back to normal.
However, the Internal Medicine doctor thinks that the reason my stomach pains are gone is because I simply haven't given my stomach any types of foods that would aggrivate it. If I were to eat normal foods again it would flair up and hurt again.
I would like to think that the GI specialist is right.
So most likely tomorrow they will promote me to a more solid food diet which would consist of some pudding, etc. in the morning and hopefully to some starches by afternoon. They have told me that I would most likely be here until Thursday unless by some miracle I improved so well that there was no reason to keep me here for observation.
I really do just want to go home, but I also don't want to go home and have the same things happen and put me back here again. I would like to get all the answers that we can so that we know how to handle this.
As we've been here in the hospital with Taylor, I have snuggled with him and gazed on him and know that this has all been worth it. I wouldn't trade him for anything. But I have been through a lot the last month or so, I'm ready for a break, I want my strong body back, I'm tired of having a "special" condition that requires ease, I want to go the gym, I want to recover, I just want to feel like me again.
I now have fears about ever getting pregnant again. I just think "What will happen next time?" Pregnancy seems to really do a number on my body. While we have been here, there have been many families check into, have their babies and already leave while we are still here. I feel bad for myself sometimes as I hear mothers up and down the hallway pushing and giving birth after a few hours, and then go home the next day - whereas I labored for many hours with both of my pregnancies only to end up with csections. I really have envied them, I admit.
But then I look at my two beautiful boys and realize how worth it it's all been. I would definitely do it all over again. Our little joke with both pregnancies has been that I make the most beautiful, healthy, strong babies who pass all tests with flying colors but I always suffer. Healthy baby - suffering Mama. And Will doesn't think that it's a good idea to discuss future children for a while - until after I've had some time to forget this entire experience and recover. He's right, but still I can't help feel scared. I still would like a little girl....but yeah, we won't even be talking about that for a LONNNNNG time.
I have bruises all over my arms and probably 20 holes from all the blood draws. I'd been wearing the same outfit for days and so that was getting gross. However, today Will went home and grabbed us some clean clothes, my hair dryer and curling iron, some soap, clean underwear and some games and other things to keep us occupied. I got to take a shower tonight and wash/blowdry my hair. I feel SOOOOO much better. :) Plus clean clothes are awesome as well. So it makes up for the yuckies I have to put up with.
Well, thanks for putting up with my long updates. Tomorrow is another day of blooddraws and exciting food options. Yippee.
Thanks mom and dad for watching Preston for us - you have been so nice to do that and I know he is in good hands.
Thanks to the Goodwins for the beautiful flowers this morning and People mag. That was a nice surprise to wake up to. Soooo thoughtful - thank you.
We haven't had any access to Facebook or Email while in the hospital so our blog has been the only communication via the web, so sorry if you have tried to email us. However, a friend is letting us borrow a laptop for the rest of our stay so we should be able to hook up to the WiFi now. (thanks Chris).
Will went and got a Redbox movie, so tonight we're watching "The Backup Plan". Haha what an appropriate movie since we are in the maternity ward.
Well, it's dinner time. I believe I am getting celery broth for dinner. Woohoo. Exciting times.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
They took my food away again, and this time my water too. I was pretty bummed about that. They took my blood again this morning and my lypaise (sp?) levels were up to 2,000. Yesterday they were at 800. (those are the enzymes in the pancreas).
I was pretty surprised to hear that because I am feeling pretty good. I woke up thinking that we would get to go home today.
So after they took my food and water away, they brought me 2 huge things of this yucky stuff to drink for a CT scan that they wanted to do on my pancreas and gall bladder. It lights up my intestines for the scan.
So they did the CT scan this morning, and my pancreas looked great. No inflamation at all. But they thought that they saw some "sludge" in my gall bladder.
Then they hooked me up to an IV for fluids, and gave me a Lisex pill that is supposed to get any access fluid off my body (makes you pee like nonstop). Then the doctor came in and told me NOT to pee because they needed my bladder full for the ultrasound.
So I was a bit annoyed that they gave me a flushing pill and then told me not to pee. Grr.
So then about an hour later, they sent in an ultrasound tech and they did an ultrasound on my belly to check my pancreas, gall bladder, and uterus. They wanted to make sure that there wasn't anything lingering in the uterus after the csection. It looked great. And the pancreas looked great too. The gall bladder looked great, except for they did see some sludge in there.
You are probably just as confused as we were. Will went and looked up all this stuff on the Wikopedia to understand more of what all the doctors were talking about.
So basically, when you eat food your pancreas secretes two things - enzymes and insulin. Your liver also secretes bile that then goes into your gall bladder and breaks down. Together they meet at a duct that enters your intestines and all these things together work to break down your food. They think that there is some "sludge" coming from my gall bladder that is blocking the entry into the intestines, and therefore that is why my pancreas is secreting extra amounts of the enzyme.
They told us that this is sometimes a common thing for women who go through pregnancy because there is a linkage between estrogen levels and it having an effect on the gall bladder, etc.
I have still been a little bit shocked by everything just because I have never had any major health problems in my life. I have always been healthy, the only bones I've ever broken were a toe, the only hospital stays I've had were for my csections. So it's really weird to be here in the hospital and come into the ER for one thing (preclampsia) and then be here 3 and 1/2 days later and now it's an issue with my gall bladder.
So the internal medicine doctor just came down to talk to us and told us that he would have the a surgeon look at all my charts and scans and give us his opinion as well to see if it would be necessary to have my gall bladder taken out.
When he said that, I was of course resistant to that idea because I tend to gravitate towards natural remedies first because surgeries and such.
A half hour passed...and now one of my OB's just came down to talk to us and told us that she talked to the surgeon. He said since I am no longer feeling any pain in my abdomen, and because there were no stones (just "sludge") that there is no reason to take the gall bladder out (yay!).
They are now allowing me to drink a liquid diet for the next 24 hours, and then they will prick me again to get a blood draw to check my enzyme levels. If things are still looking okay, then I will get to eat a lowfat diet and then go from there.
I'm not exactly sure what is going to happen from here. I don't know if they are going to send us home, or keep me here for observation for the next day or so.
I'm thinking that the reason my pain has gone away is because they have basically been starving me, so there has been no food to digest really (other than pea soup, applesauce, and pudding which tasted like heaven...). I think once I go back to eating food again, I might have the same stomach issues that I had before. Who knows.
Two more babies were born this morning on our floor here in the maternity ward. I didn't hear it, but Will did. Apparently they were screamers (both moms and babies).
Well, Will is officially sick of eating fast food and gets pretty excited when they offer him my food tray that they originally thought I was going to get to eat and then take it away from me. Taylor is a champ and such a good baby, just hanging out. He hardly ever cries unless he's hungry. When he's awake he just looks around and is very observant.
We still haven't gotten much sleep due to lots of vital checks, exams, blood draws, nurse interuptions, Taylor feedings, etc. through the night. We are hoping to get a nap in this afternoon.
I got to take a shower last night and it felt soooo good.
Anyway. That is it. Later.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
They took me off of the magnesium sulfate around noon today. It made me feel like a wet noodle. I was sluring my speech and dizzy, and my arms and legs felt like they weighed a zillion pounds to raise. So once they finally took me off of it, the drousy-drugged feeling wore off after a couple of hours and I have felt better to actually get out of bed and walk around a bit.
So I guess the latest update is that I finally got to eat some food around 2pm today. It was the first time I'd eaten anything in about 48 hours. They wanted to see how my stomach and pancreas handled it. They have been afraid that I have pancreatis (sp?). However, when they feel around I no longer have pain and the ultrasound on my organs showed they were not inflamed. So the fact that my pancreas is still secreting high amounts of an enzyme that it's not supposed to be is bizzare.
I have to say that bland vanilla low-carb pudding and pea & mint soup never tasted so good in my life. (Yes you read that right - pea and mint soup). I don't even like cranberry juice and that tasted like heaven to me.
They also took me off of my IV fluids and put me on a diarhetic pill that helps to get the rest of the water off of my body. I had to pee like every 15 minutes. But at the same time, I have had to keep drinking buckets of water so that I can keep up my milk supply. I met with the lactation specialist this evening, and she told me that a woman can actually go 2 weeks without food and still breastfeed as long as she is drinking fluids. So I just have to make sure that I am still drinking lots and lots of water.
Um what else.
My blood pressure has come down some. They have started me on a blood pressure pill that helps it to come down. It works over time. Earlier today it was in the 150's over 80. Then a few hours later, in the 140's, and then the last time they took my BP was about 2 hours ago and it was in the high 130's.
I guess for those who are familiar with the term, you will understand about preclampsia. That is what my OB says that I have had - and she doesn't understand why. Usually women get preclampsia towards the end of their pregnancy and having the baby is the cure. Sometimes women can get it after the baby is born, but usually it happens in women who have a history of hypertension. I have never had high blood pressure in my life, and so my OB is really confused as to why my BP was so high and why I developed preclampsia.
What they are doing now is having me continue to take the BP medicine and hope to get my levels down to 120/70, which is what they usually are. They are still checking my vitals as well to check my resting heartrate. And they will be doing another blood draw tomorrow morning to see what the enzyme levels in my pancreas and liver are. It is very baffling to them that my stomach no longer has pain, but I'm still secreting the enzyme. I show no signs of the typical pancreatis, except for the enzyme count.
So I guess you could say that I am really confusing both my OB and the internal medicine doctor. They aren't quite sure what to do with me yet, and so they are keeping me under observation possibly until tomorrow evening or Monday.
Now that I am not on the magnesium anymore, I can actually talk normally and focus my vision (I was seeing double) and feel good enough to get up out of bed and walk around (hence why I am on the computer). It feels great to not be in bed any longer and to be able to walk around without feeling like the room is spinning.
They still have my IV in so that they can give me an "GI Cocktail" to keep things moving down there.
The only thing still bothering me is my headache. If I keep up on painkillers, it helps but as soon as the painkillers wear off the headache is there again. I have experienced some bad headaches before but this is the worst I've had in my life. Everytime my heart would beat a pulse, it would shoot all this pressure into my head and I felt like someone was taking their hands and squishing my head with each pulse. They gave me morphine 3 times and it didn't even do anything for my headache. They finally gave me something that is 10 times as strong as morhpine and it zapped the headache, but because it's a narcotic that goes through the IV it only lasts for about 2 hours and then it's out of the system. They finally found a painkiller that I can take orally that is a combo of caffeine and a few other things. It is not a typical painkiller though so I don't know the name of it.
Everything I have taken they have made sure that it is okay to take while breastfeeding Tayor. However to be on the safe side, I have made sure to feed him first, then take the painkillers, and then wait 2 hours before feeding him again so that it was out of my system.
Yesterday was a complete blur to me. All I know is that there were lots of doctors coming in to talk to me, people doing EKG's, ultrasounds and a lot of other tests on me. It's been really nice to know that I'm healthy - since all of the tests came back with flying colors. I just wish they could figure out why my pancreas is secreting the weird enzyme and why my BP was so high. My fear is going home and it happening all over again.
The funny thing about all of this is, is all day Thursday when I wasn't feeling very good it's like I knew what was wrong with my body. I knew there was something wrong with my stomach, and it wasn't a virus. It hurt really bad when I touched it or tried to lay down. It had nothing to do with feeling nauseous. I tried to lay down and cried out in pain, and I don't usually cry about pain unless it is pretty bad. So I knew something wasn't right.
I also knew that my pulse was low. I asked my mom to take my pulse, and though I don't think her assessment was completely accurate, she did find that it was low (she said it was 55 bpm). Having that low of a heartrate was not normal for me so I was worried about that too.
And then the fact that I felt like I couldn't breathe very well - I knew something was up with my blood pressure and that is why I asked Will to take me to a drug store so that I could get my blood pressure taken. Although, I actually thought that it was going to be low BP due to my low heartrate. I was surprised to see that it was high.
When 3am came and I was so frustrated and started getting this massive killer headache, Will asked me if I wanted him to go to the ER. Honestly I said yes only because all I wanted was for a qualified medical professional to look at me and tell me "You are fine. Nothing is wrong with you." so that I could rest easy and not worry about it. I had no idea that I would spend 5 hours in the ER and then be admitted to the hospital and be here for possibly 4 days.
I guess we know our bodies better than we think we do and should always listen to our hunches when something might be possibly wrong.
We are back in the Family Maternity Center now, only because we have a baby and because part of my condition is preclampsia. The nursing staff in the Progressive Unit on the 5th floor also felt more comfortable with us being staffed by OB nurses who knew how to deal with drug interactions with the baby and so forth.
I have only eaten pureed foods so far, but tomorrow I will get to try some more solid things like crackers and such. They will have me on a very lowfat diet because of the pancreas issues. I'm really looking forward to getting to eat another vanilla pudding tonight because I'm starving. Fasting for 48 hours was no fun, especially while lactating. Ice chips never tasted so good.
I can't really think of anything else. Thank you for all your well wishes and prayers. I admit that I have been pretty frightened while here. At first they wanted to rule out the worst case scenarios and told me about some serious conditions that they were testing me for and so it worried me.I am so grateful that all of my scans and tests so far have come back confirming that I have a healthy body.
It is fun to be back in the maternity ward. We just listened to the woman next door push a baby out and hear the baby's first cry. It is also nice to be here and not be in labor. Will has rented a RedBox movie and we will watch it tonight. It's the first time we will have turned the TV on because up until now any type of sound or bright lights have aggrivated my headache.
I also got to ride in a wheelchair for the first time. Twice. And be on a stretcher. I got my 2nd CT scan, and had ultrasounds on my liver, pancreas, stomach, lungs, and kindeys (weird to have an ultrasound other than my uterus). I have about 9 holes in both of my arms from IV and blood prick pokes. I had 2 EKG tests, as well as an ultrasound on my heart (which was pretty cool to watch). My OB removed the steri-strips from my Csection incision and has checked it about twice a day and is happy to tell me that it looks beautiful and is completely closed. My OB has been awesome during this. She has come in on her time off to check on me and given me hugs and smiles. I'm so glad that she has been here for me.
Most of all I'm so grateful for Will. He has been so supportive. I kept apologizing because he was supposed to take Preston camping on Friday night for the ward campout and he had been telling Preston all week that they were going to go camping. Luckily Grandpa just got back from camping and he set up his tent in their back yard to clean if off and so Preston got to play in a tent after all. Will has been an award winning Dad and taking care of Taylor and passing him to me for feedings and cuddling. All of the nurses have told me that they think I have the perfect husband. I have to agree with them :)
One last cute thing. While we were on the Progressive Unit floor for the past day and a half, Will walked around a lot in the hallways. He told me that most of the patients on the floor were elderly men. It made me laugh, because I noticed that we had a lot of nurses come into our room to take a look at our baby. They would get so excited and give us lots of compliments on the beautiful baby. I also had a lot of nurses watch me breastfeed. I thought it was weird, but they got so excited and would just ooh and awe to watch him feed. I guess it didn't dawn on me until Will mentioned that all of the other patients were elderly men when it made sense why we were such popular patients on the 5th floor.
Anyway. I need to go eat something and get back to Will and Taylor in our room. Hopefully we will get to go home tomorrow evening, but if not it will be Monday morning. Thanks again for your love and prayers.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Yesterday she was having a rough day. She was complaining about her stomach hurting whenever she ate food, so she was avoiding food as much as possible. On top of that she was having some other weird pains. She couldn't get comforable in her make-shift bed. If she tried to lay down on our flat bed she had difficulting breathing. She also wasn't able to nap as everytime she would start to doze off, she kept feeling like she wasn't breathing and would startle herself awake. She was also swollen still even being 9 days postpartum and she probably wouldn't mention this, but had yet to lose any weight. She still weighed the same as before she delivered Taylor, so you know she was uncomfortable from all the swelling
She called her doctor last night (who just happened to be on call) and mentioned some of the systems she was having. The doctor thought it might be some stomach virus and told her to go on the B.R.A.T diet (Bread, Rice, Apples?, Toast).
Jenni was pretty sure that was not the case and when I got home at 9pm she asked me to take her to the local drugstore and have her blood presure / pulse taken. She was afraid her blood pressure was too low.
Her blood pressure ended up being 138 / 82. This is quite high for Jenni as she is usually never over 120 even when she is stressed. Her pulse was a measly 40 bpm, which is way low as she is usually 70's-80's.
We decided to go home and just take it easy through the night and if she was still having the issues then we would go into her doctor's office in the morning.
Well, Jenni never could get comfortable and ended up getting a really bad headache. She tried sleeping in 3 different places and nothing worked. By 3am she still hadn't slept and she had been crying on and off because of the pain. I asked if she wanted to go to the E.R. and she said yes.
Luckily, her mom was here on her last night, so she stayed with Preston, and then Jenni, Taylor & I went to the E.R. Her headache was the worst she has ever had and I have seen her go through some pretty bad headaches. Once in the E.R. around 4am they took her vitals and started an IV (which took 3 pokes and 30 minutes because she was so swollen). Her blood pressure was through the roof at 185 / 90 and her pulse was still down at 40 bpm. They did x-rays, cat scans, heart monitoring, and about 5 different blood tests.
Luckily her OB was on call at the hospital so the ER doctor was communicating with her OB through this whole process. All the test came back great, except for some enzyme that was excreting from her pancreas that really shouldn't be (hence the stomach pain). They said going without food for 24 hours should restart her pancreas and getting it excreting the correct enzymes.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Preston is being soooo good at sharing his toys with Taylor...
And we were able to take a few rare precious shots of Taylor with his eyes open...(because he mostly just sleeps ALL day long)...
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
The weather here in Seattle has been fantastic lately.
Trying to get my mind of of not having had a baby yet, we decided to head up to Camano Island on Saturday and go to the beach with my mom (my dad had a meeting).
Here's me sitting in my camp chair.
I do think my feet look rather good for being so pregnant.
It was a perfect evening.
Preston, and Will played on the beach...
While Tessha took a stroll and talked with an old friend.
They offered to let him sit in it, but he was too shy. Instead he went up to it and gave it a good smack.
Friday, August 13, 2010
...the day of my csection if I would have stayed with my original doctor.
I would of had a baby right now.
My husband would have been elated to have two kids born on Friday the 13th.
I would be out of pregnancy misery.
I'm starting to wonder if I will ever go into labor. Each day I hope...and each day is another day I feel like crap with absolutely no signs of labor.
Even my braxton hicks have tapered off considerably.
At least with an extra week, even if I don't go into labor, I won't ever have to wonder "what if I would have just had more time", and can be okay with knowing I did everything and I mean EVERYTHING to give my body the chance to vbac.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
I admit my post yesterday was a bit of a downer.
I was pretty depressed after my dr appt. I appreciate the support and comments. Granted, sometimes when you feel like poop the last thing you want to read are comments from people trying to get you to cheer up, but thanks anyway :)
Today I am more positive. Just trying to remember that I can only do what I can, and the rest is not up to me.
My friend Erika came over today and brought her son Camden, so that Preston could have a little friend to play with. WOW did he need it! The poor guy has just needed some friend time. Tessha has been an awesome job entertaining him and playing lots of Lego's, but haha - he's wearing her out. I think she was grateful for the break :)
We went for a 1/2 mile walk. It was by far more painful than my walks last week. Those darn pelvic bones were really screaming at me, but I was determined.
I've been doing rotations on the ball too. And still taking my "birth" herbs to stimulate something.
It's exciting to realize that next weekend we'll have our baby here.
If we can just agree on his name, that would be awesome...
We have not agreed on any names these past 9 months. My husband is possibly THE pickiest name person on the face of the planet. However, over the past month or so we had finally found a name that we both semi-agreed upon. Until last night that is...when Will started doing statistical research on the name and found that in recent years it has flipped to more of a girl name than a boy name.
I strongly disagree.
I can't tell you what the name is, but I think if I did tell you, you would agree with me that it is still very much a boy name.
So...I don't know. I really like the name, Will really likes the name...except now he is second guessing it. I think maybe since I carried the baby for 9 months and endured a lot of physical hardship in doing so, I get to pick the name. :) Haha.
Anyway. Trying to stay more positive here. Thanks for letting me vent when I need to, and for the support of my decisions and approaches.
P.S. I got surprise flowers delivered to me this morning. Thank you Tanya :)
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Yes, I'm still here and still fat and pregnant.
I had my 39 week Dr Appt this morning (38 and 1/2, being I won't be officially 39 for a couple of days).
It's weird to think that my next doctor appointment next Tuesday will be my 40 week appointment and then that's it. Thursday is my scheduled csection.
I have 8 days left until the csect date.
8 days to still try to encourage labor.
8 days of absolute miserableness.
See, God and I are pretty close and we have this agreement. I know that if it's safe for me to do a VBAC, then He'll make it happen. He'll help this little one to come early. Because given everything I've gone through to seek out a new doctor and change everything over just so that I can have the opportunity to try to VBAC, He surely knows what it would mean to me.
However, I know that if this little one does not come early, then it's Heavenly Father's way of telling me "Look, I know what is best for you and the baby and VBAC'ing is not it. End of story."
After going to my appointment this morning and finding out that there had been no change, yet again, for the 3rd appt in a row...I was seriously starting to doubt this whole vbac thing.
I was trying to not get my hopes up, but given how poopy I felt yesterday (it was seriously like THE worst I've felt in my entire life), I thought for sure it was a sign that this baby would be coming soon. I could have sworn he dropped even more, and with him keeping me up for 2 hours straight last night while he wiggled, stretched, kicked and more....I thought for sure he's trying to kick his way out and is getting things ready.
Still 80% effaced, still at a -2 station, and that !@)#(*!@#*)&(*^ cervix is still high and closed. (I don't really swear, but I thought that would get my point across about how I feel about my cervix right now. You can replace those exclamations with whatever you want. I was thinking "stupid", but whatever you want, like I said).
I know that the power of positive thinking, particularly when it comes to the human body, can have a big impact. I've really been trying to keep hope and stay positive. But I have to admit, after today's appointment, the only thing I could think was "My cervix is incompetant. I'm going to have a csection because my cervix is doing the exact same thing it did last time. My body just does not have a clue how to let go and go into labor on its own."
After being in induced labor with Preston for 22 hours, I was dialated to "maybe a 5, if even that" (said my doctor), "but your cervix is still up behind his head."
Now I don't understand all of the logistics of my own anatomy and how things work and come into place for labor, but I do know that the cervix is the door and if the door isn't in place, nothing's coming in or out. And apparently my body thinks it's Fort Knox.
It's hard to think positively right now, or to think that "this time it will be different."
Will said to me this morning "You still have 8 more days to try." All I heard in my head was "You have to still endure 8 more days of pain and misery."
Seriously, if you don't know why this last homestretch is miserable, here is a brief list of reasons why:
- My hips hurt
- My pelvic bones feel like they're being grinded on
- I feel like I can't get enough rest and am completely overly tired
- I have a baby's head that feels like it's between my legs
- I'm so loose that when I stand up after sitting, I feel like I'm going to dislocate something on my first step.
- My back is killing me- I'm super emotional and moody
- My legs will sporatically go numb from baby pushing on nerves
- I'm just DONE.
I think I just need to take a nap and catch up on some sleep, and then remotivate myself about this.
I'm going to try to do the exercise ball some more this afternoon to see if that will help (sitting on it and rotating hips around to try to encourage the cervix to come down).
That stupid stupid lame cervix. Er, uh, I mean wonderful cooperative healthy cervix!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Yes, there are other things going on besides this baby.
I wish I had photos to post, but I don't. It would have made for a more interesting post.
For the past few weeks, Will has taken several morning hikes and adventures which have left me quite jealous to say the least. If you are friends with him on Facebook, you can see the video clips he has posted at several different peaks he's been up to. The weather here in Seattle has been really gorgeous (up until 2 days ago) and so he's got some really great footage that will leave you breathless.
He's still bike commuting to work. I thought that would be exercise enough for him, but the crazy guy still craves more :) Thursday he got up at 4am and hiked up a mountain with a friend, then biked into work. And on Friday he got up at 4am, biked to the trail head, met his friend and hiked, then biked into work. I think he said he did like 50 miles that day.
He won't be bike commuting too much longer though, as sadly, once again Will is getting laid off from his job. His last day was actually supposed to be last Friday, however, he still has some training that he needs to do with his boss and so he's been asked to stay an additional week.
In short, the company he has been working for for the last 8 months has been struggling financially and has to lay off most of the employees, otherwise shut their doors completely. Being that Will has been doing the finances for the company, he sort of saw this coming. So it wasn't too much of a surprise for us, but the timing of it all was. I admit for a couple of days after he told me he got the layoff warning 3 weeks ago, I was stressed. But now I look at it as a blessing because he'll get to be home to help out with the new baby for a little bit (while looking for a job as well).
We will be fine. We always are. These things always turn out to be blessings in disguises. When one door shuts, another opens.
Aunt Tessha has been in town since last Wednesday, and we are incredibly grateful for her presence. I know it is not easy for her with her chronic fatigue, but she has been a wonderful help. She has gotten up with Preston in the mornings, fed him breakfast, gotten him dressed, done our dishes, cleaned our house....Those are just a few of the things that she has done for us.
She left for the weekend to spend some time with Alisha (who is at Elizabeth & James' home),but she'll be back tonight. I'm not sure how long we'll get to have her here helping out, but for however long it is, we are grateful. Thank you.
Preston is anxious to meet his baby brother. But in the meantime, he's been having fun playing with his cars, reading books, and going for walks.
So anyway - that's the update. I have my 39 week doctor appointment tomorrow. I've been extremely exhausted and not feeling well. Maybe those are good signs that this baby is coming soon? Who knows. Most people think the hardest part is after the baby arrives, but with how I've been feeling lately (and how I felt before I had Preston), I know that for me personally it's the time before the baby comes where I really struggle. At least that is how it was with Preston. Once he arrived, it felt so good to not be pregnant anymore that I think I was on some sort of high for months afterwards and was always in a good mood. Hopefully looking forward to that once again and returning to my normal happy self.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
...if anything comes of it.
But I'm not getting my hopes up.
We've been on a mission in our household for the past few days. It's called "Get Pregnant Woman Into Labor By Any Means Possible".
While my duedate is still 10 days away, I'm on a timeline to encourage this baby to come early otherwise I have no choice but to do a csection on the 19th. So it is with much haste and creativity that we try to encourage this little guy to come early...
I've been pretty miserable. I can safely say that I have been the most exhausted I've ever been in my life. And it's kind of weird - since I'm normally a person who has multiple lists of things to do and can multi-task like a crazy woman.
Lately I can lay down for 2 hours and not even feel any sort of motivation to get up. Even if I don't sleep...just laying there feels good.
Despite not feeling good, I'm determined to get this labor started ya'll. (sorry just thought of the song "Let's get this party started ya'll!").
Thursday morning, Preston and I went for a nice long walk up our driveway and back. I know - you're laughing because I just said driveway. Except our driveway is 1/4 mile long, so up and back is 1/2 mile.
Friday night, Will, Preston, and I all went up the driveway and back TWICE. So make that 1 whole entire mile.
And today we decided to try the labor inducing trick of "bumpy car rides".
This, of course, got Will really excited because hello it involved going off-roading into the wilderness on unexplored gravel roads where no man (or pregnant woman) may have been before.
The trip started off with a stop to Subway, where we each picked out foot-long subs and devoured them within a half hour, including 3 cookies and ice water. I admit, my appetite has been like a lion lately, but even that footlong was a bit much for me. My stomach felt like it had been stretched to new lengths afterwards -which is really saying something.
So with an entire footlong Italian combo Subway sandwich sitting in my stomach, we embarked on our adventure onto a forest logging road into the mountains.
Once we finally left paved road and hit gravel, I thought Okay this isn't going to be so bad. But as we got further and further away from civilization, the road got bumpier and bumpier.
"Ughhhh", I would say with a laugh.
Preston was in the backseat saying "Bump! Bump! Funny!" while giggling. And all three of us were laughing at my discomfort, while talking to the baby in my belly trying to encourage him to come out.
Driving on a bumpy road is uncomforable enough when it's paved, while pregnant, so to do it on gravel with pot holes and washboards...well, all I can say is you must be desperate to go into labor to do it.
Eventually, I stopped laughing and it no longer was funny (though Preston and Will were still laughing).
I was just getting annoyed.
"Okay, can you just stop the car for a second? I just need a moment of no jiggles." I asked.
Will stopped the car, and I still felt my body vibrating as if I'd been on some sort of carnival ride. It felt pretty good to not ride on that stupid bumpy road any more.
Eventually we started going again, and so did the bumps, and well so did my bladder.
"I need to pee, can we pull over really soon?" I said, super anxiously, as my bladder went boingedy-boingedy-boink.
We pulled over and because I'm super smart and well prepared, I brought my own roll of toilet paper. Only I didn't forcast that going to the bathroom in the woods camping-style was not as easy while 9 months pregnant. To save you the details, I will just say that I had to take my pants and underwear completely off while hoping another car would not drive by and see me completely birthday-suited from the waist down.
Sorry, but when you have to go you just do what you need to do.
While I was taking my woodland potty break, I hear this hissing sound coming from our car."By the way, the back tire is leaking air like crazy." I tell my husband as he's waiting for me.
He looks at me like No way are you serious kind of look, and goes to check.
Sure enough our back left tire is loosing air at an amazing rate and going flat.
Good thing we're in the middle of no where because this scene would not look rediculous at all to passerby'ers. Not at all. Me, 9 months pregnant going to the bathroom half naked and my husband tearing our car apart to get the spare out to change our flat tire on our VW Jetta (every other vehicle we'd seen was a huge pickup truck).
We were stopped for about a half hour while Will so galantly changed the tire, while Preston and I wandered around (I was dressed by this point thank you very much).
Then it started to rain. Like hard.
I brought Preston's yellow rainjacket for him, but neither Will and I had any jackets. So we got soaked while Preston had a hayday trying to "help" Papa change a tire.
Eventually all was well once again and we all got back into the car.
I was actually pretty ready to turn around, but Will wanted to go further because "We don't know what's around the next corner" (said in a little boyish pretty-please sort of voice).
All I could imagine was getting yet another flat tire, and this time not having a spare, me going into labor, and we are stuck in the middle of no where.
Luckily that didn't happen.
To make this story a tad bit shorter, we eventually turned around and started home. Only we had to go back all those bumps that we'd already crossed and so I got jiggled around once again. And I will say by that point I was NOT HAPPY about it.
Why? Because our "Let's go for a bumpy car ride" ended up being a 3 HOUR bumpy car ride.
We're back home now. And all I have to say is if this adventure didn't jumpstart something inside me I'll be pretty upset.
Obviously, I'm sitting here typing a blog instead of going into labor so as of right now nothing's happening.
But if something does happen, it will make a pretty funny labor story.....you know, the time that we tried to get mama to go into labor, went up the mountains, had a flat tire, she was miserable but later that night she went into labor.
That would be pretty sweet actually.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
I had my 38 week Dr Appt this morning, even though I technically won't be 38 weeks for 2 more days. It was quite the morning. I'll try to make this short.
My sister-in-law just got into Seattle last night and she is going to be staying until the baby is born. She has been a huge help so far. This morning she stayed home with Preston so I wouldn't have to drag him to my doctor appointment. That turned out to be a blessing because I was there for about 3 hours and I know Preston would have been going crrrrrrazy.
Will came with me though, which was really nice.
We got there and the nurse came out to tell us that my doctor was called into an emergency Csection but she would probably be back in about 30 min. I figured I'd give her 45, but she didn't come until it had been about an hour and 10 minutes.
We waited in the exam room the entire time. Will got to read brochures about birth control and how to have a vascectomy. It was quite educational - LOL.
He also had fun looking at the diagrams on the wall of a woman's pelvis. He said "Whoa, it's no wonder you have to pee all of the time. Your uterus is like sitting on your bladder!"
Um yes, babe, I've told you this.
He also played with the stethescope, and the lights on the exam table, as well as explored what was in all of those drawers by the sink. There was a drawer labled "Snacks". I got really excited, but unfortunately there were no snacks in that drawer.
Anyway, when the doctor finally arrived she listened to the baby's heartbeat - which was super fast. He was excited again. She didn't tell me what the bpm was. She also went over a bunch of pre-csection paperwork that I had to sign, so that I was aware of all of the risks involved (they are planning for my csection unless I go into labor before then on my own).
Then she did the pelvic exam.
She said that she would strip my membranes today if it wasn't too uncomfortable. (Stripping the membranes is where she takes her finger and seperates the sac from the cervix, which creates, um,....argh I can't remember the word....starts with a "p"....anyway it helps you go into labor).
She said "Well the good news is that the baby's head is very very low and you are very thinned out".
Thank you. That is what you said last week. Continuing on...
"But your cervix is still pretty high up here...I'm going to see if I can do anything though..."She tried to strip the membranes but it was really painful. I was super uncomfortable and it hurt. So she stopped. "It's too painful so I'm not going to try any more." She said.
"I'm on call this weekend though, so it would be a perfect weekend for the baby's birthday! Do lots of walking, at least as much as you are comfortable doing. And you're doing great - baby's head is low and you are thin. I'll see you soon."
Oh and she gave me a perscription for a sleeping aide, because I haven't been sleeping well at all the past few weeks and I'm completely exhausted and sleep deprived.
I will say that the appointment was painful. And for about 15 minutes afterwards it was still painful. I wanted to cry. But I didn't.
Then Will and I went downstairs to the maternity ward because we had a "Pre-Admit" appointment. This is where they talk to you and tell you exactly what is going to happen during the csection, where you come, what you bring, and then they also take down all your medical history and stuff and have you sign a bajillion papers.
This took another hour.
I was already depressed from my doctor appointment, and then to have to sit there for another hour talking about all the details of my scheduled csection while my stomach felt like it was going to eat itself out of pure starvation was just not really ideal if you ask me.
By the time we finally left, I wanted to just cry.
It's not that I expected to have made progress down there today, but to hear my cervix was still high and that she couldn't strip my membranes, blah blah blah....well it was all too reminiscent of my final doctor appointments when I was pregnant with Preston and heard similar things.
I've been trying to keep the faith this whole time, but today I just felt hopeless, sad, like giving up, and a little depressed.
Will tried to cheer me up by reminding me that Preston never really dropped and this one has. So that is good. I guess I just need some sleep. I'm uncomfortable. And tired. And feel like either way this baby comes out it's like I have to prepare for a marathon or something. I just want the baby to be here and skip the whole birth part. Is that okay?
Anyway. My bloodpressure was 120/70, I gained 2 pounds (making my overall weightgain 39 pounds), and everything else looked great.
I'm planning to do some walking between now and this weekend. The little guy's head is right down there grinding away and thinning things out. I just need that cervix to move down into position is all.
Wish me luck.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
For the past several weeks, my parents have taken Preston at least once a week - usually overnight.
This last week, Preston stayed at G&G's for THREE days. This was by far the longest he's ever been away from us.
When I called the next morning after my parents took Preston, I asked how his first night was. My mom said that they went to the beach and ate baked beans, hot dogs, and pasta salad.
And not only did my mom wean Preston of his bottle while he was gone, but he learned all sorts of new phrases like "okey dokey", and new skills like ringing the front doorbell over...and over...
while shouting "I press the button! I press the button!"
I have to say the highlight of Preston's trip to Bramma and Bumpa's house had to of been his trip to go see the cars...
I shall explain.
First you should know that Preston, who is only 2 years old, is a HUGE huge huge huge fan of cars. He loves to watch cars drive on the road (naming any sort of convertable a "fast car...varroom!"), he loves the movie "Cars" and has a small collection of Lightening McQueen's, Mators, and such...
And while most of his other obsessions have come and gone (like the ball phase), the car phase has stuck. For a LONG time. He's liked cars probably since last Fall.
So my parents have a friend who is a car collector. Well, he collects old classic cars, restores them, and takes them to auto shows across the country and has won "Best in Show" many times.
He doesn't just have a couple of cars. He has a couple of BARNS full of cars.
Well, apparently, he had a real Hudson Hornet. You know, the old blue race car from the movie "Cars"? One of those.
As you can see below, he brought his blue Hudson Hornet (in his hand), and his huge excited grin.
I'm tellin' ya, this place was a car lover's PARADISE.
Preston noticed all of the miniature cars lined up on the wall and got pretty excited...
And as if he couldn't get any luckier, Brent (My parents' friend) let Preston play in all of the mini cars.
Apparently he didn't like the mechanical rocking horse though - haha.
There was another Hudson car (not a Hornet) that Preston was allowed to actually sit in and push any buttons that he wanted, and pretend to drive it.
He was ecstatic.
I was told that Brent was pretty impressed by how much Preston already knew about cars for only being 2 years old.
And here he is again next to the Hornet...
Preston has LOADS of fun at G&G's house and I knew he was sad to have to come home Saturday morning.
Thank you Bramma and Bumpa for taking care of our sweet boy for a few days. I was able to get a little bit of rest, some work done on my final pre-baby music project, and Will was able to get some job searching done (more about that later...).